Jacer's Racers, a walk/run for life in memory of Jace Steinhaus

Thank you, our dear prayer warriors, for the on-going prayer and thoughts for our family during this critical time of healing from our grandson’s death. We’ve all admitted being in a fog at times with some days speeding by with little real productivity. However, in the midst of this fog, we’ve been driven to our Lord’s Word for comfort, strength, and wisdom taking more time than usual to ponder His goodness in the midst of hurt and trial. In truth, we shouldn’t wonder at the countless ways God has been blessing in the midst of this particular time of brokenness. His Word says we should expect His grace to be manifest in our weakness. God is good and gives sustaining strength and comfort to those who seek Him earnestly even in our imperfect and inept ways! We’ve all learned a tremendous amount about what walking in faith truly means. We miss our little man very much and feel such a conflict of emotions when we look at his pictures and watch his videos. What life he had while he was with us; a gift from God that is now with our Lord.

Life continues speeding past for all of us. Barry, Sean, and Danny all are spending many hours at work, Lauren has been subbing in for coaches on vacation or leave at Sienna Plantation Aquatics and volunteering at a local crisis pregnancy center, Madelyn has been coaching and nannying, and I’ve been picking up numerous ‘pieces’ with preparation for classes, finding my house again, getting reacquainted with friends, and being glue around here while the rest of us ‘run away from home’! One thing all six of us have noticed is a profound tiredness that can’t be ignored. We were warned to expect such amazing lethargy, but putting all warning aside, we have still been surprised by it.

Now on to the purpose of this email: Our little Jace lived almost three months. Those of you who attended Jace’s June 14th memorial service and/or the reception that followed it may have picked up a Jacer’s Racers card announcing the ‘possibility’ of a Walk/Run in memory of Jace three months from his death to raise funds for a ‘pro-life’ organization. The details of this low-key, casual event are coming into place. Our family is viewing this event as a time to not only remember Jace as a true example of worthy humanity, a life worth sparing despite physical handicaps, but also as an event to raise some funds for an organization devoted to giving the love of Christ to women in crisis situations, struggling with the decision to end life in its most vulnerable form, the unborn child. We learned from our experience with Jace that abortion comes in many ‘packaged pleasantries’, geared to obliterate the real gift from God each human life is. The ministry of Living Alternatives not only provides for the unborn child but also provides physically as well as spiritually for the mother of that child. This website http://www.livalt.org/index.html will give you more information about the ministry of Living Alternatives. For some time, Dan and Lauren have helped support Brad and Heather Crain, a couple working specifically with the Living Alternatives home in Tyler, Texas.

For more information about the Jacer’s Racers Walk/Run for Life on Saturday, September 6, 2008, please see http://www.jacersracers.com. Registration is now open and will end August 22, 2008, so that we can order t-shirts and determine our need for police escort at Memorial Park in Sugar Land (junction of University and Commonwealth Blvd in Sugar Land). Our timeline for that morning is casual. We’ll gather at 9:00 AM, complete check-in, open with prayer and enjoy some time of fellowship as we walk/jog either a 2.5k or 5k track or seriously run a 5k or 10k track. Gatorade and Water will be in abundance. Whatever you fancy for that day, serious running for time or fun walking/jogging for fellowship, please consider donating to Living Alternatives.

Life is worth living and preserving, but the other lesson our Lord taught us through Jace is just how real and how close heaven truly is. We hope this memorial morning is a time for both celebrating the preserving of human life and enjoying the heaven-sent fellowship of those in Christ.

For Life lived in the Lord,
Kathy for the Harts and Steinhauses

Jacer says 'Bye, Bye';June 4, 2008

Musings on Jace

Ecclesiates 3:11a He has made everything beautiful in its time.

We are all on a journey.

Knowing Christ, living each day in the attempt to glorify God, or even to understand what and how to glorify our Lord does not make that journey less treacherous, but with the bitterness of brokenness this world offers, that very real relationship with Christ offers the sweetness of honey to strengthen the resolve to move onward. It is easier to live on this earth with eyes not directed forward or backward or even to the side, but upward. We truly are sojourners, dear ones.

Grief is just a piece of our journey.

It doesn’t take the death of a loved one to plunge us into this particular path. I’ve talked with several people recently on their own grief journeys involving health issues, relationship troubles, even personal insecurity.

Brokenness: The world offers only brokenness for our journey.

God offers goodness, real Goodness, not Plato’s version mired in human frailty and flawed human understanding. But then, that’s the problem. Our humanness demands a definition for goodness, demands to know why bad things happen, demands to know why we, who know God, must suffer and grieve. Our inherent brokenness, sin, wants us to cling to this earth, fearing what we can’t see right now, heaven.

Faith: We trust that God’s promises pave the road of our journey.

Then comes faith. We can know, we can trust in only one unshakeable reality when all the earth has to offer is broken relationships, bodies, or communities; my friends, we don’t belong here. We are created by our savior for His glory, and we will know His glory fully only when we are truly home, home with our Creator Father in heaven.

I won’t recount right now the passages of scripture that promise much more than this broken life or the passages that remind me that my frailty drowning in tears is a good and right response to this world’s hardness and suffering. But, dear ones, if grief on any account is weighing you down, if what the world terms depression is dogging your days, if lethargy seems to overwhelm you, don’t just try to push yourself to fill your days with activity or bask in self-pity, stop a moment, ponder His Words. If you can’t do anything else, pick up His Words and let them be a balm.

I’ve had trouble just going to the Bible and finding solace for my extreme tiredness and aimlessness which has set in since little Jace’s death, but in His good providence, several sources have ministered to me and pointed me in some concrete direction in His word. Sharon Better’s Treasures in Darkness, given to me before Jace was even born, and a devotional Lauren has used called Streams in the Desert by L. B. Cowman have been very helpful in directing me to specific scripture. I’m sure many of you know of other meaningful resources, but these two have been soothing for me at this time. I could pull out many gems from each one, but I’ll refrain, for now.

Journey: Brokenness can be a conduit of God’s love.

I’ve learned something else, too. We can’t really understand in a total way what another might be going through. We may have some similar experiences that give us needed insights, but each of us has to walk our paths before the Lord. He knows our pains. Yet, the little things help: stopping a moment to make a meal and staying to chat a moment when delivering it, crying a bit when talking with someone who’s shedding her own tears over her grief journey, or having the sensitivity to talk about what is happening with a friend or just listening as she reminisces. I haven’t necessarily wanted to go visit a friend but having someone come to me for even 5 minutes has allowed me to fellowship in a quiet way. Heartwarming. I’m learning to gladly let others do things for me, as is Lauren. I’ve also greatly appreciated when others share with me their journeys. I want to pray for others, hear another’s needs, cry or rejoice with them, too. Staying in my little box is too claustrophobic!

Jace’s earthly journey has ended, but his heavenly one has just begun: Our little man is fully healed in heaven.

Jace’s memorial celebration, June 17^th, and the reception at my in-laws home in Richmond was wonderful, full of tears and memories, family and friends. I find it utterly amazing that one little life touched so many these last 6 months. For only a little less than three months, Jace breathed the same air we breathe, yet I hope my own life has the long-lasting effects his short stint on earth has had.

I’m posting the ‘Jace says, “Good-bye.”’ video that Lauren recorded of Jace 10 days before he died. It is precious and shows his little personality and the love his mommy and daddy have for him. This video closed his celebration. Lauren and Danny both paid tribute to their little man at the service, Lauren in song singing ‘Praise Him in this storm’ and Danny delivering a precious serious of memories about Jace. The words to the song and Danny’s tribute are on Lauren’s blog: http://steinhauslm.blogspot.com/.

Amazingly, the process none of us can avoid, death, is perspective-giving.

Some days are very difficult, and we really miss Jace, especially Lauren and Dan, but others bring sweet times of remembrance and the knowledge that God gives tremendous grace and strength in the midst of tears. How difficult for Lauren and Danny to go from three back to two as if Jace had not occurred, but he did live, and he lived with significance. He showed how important each life can be. Life should not be wasted whether it is the actual journey we travel or the actual biological process that so many carelessly toss away before birth. And Jace showed clearly that to ‘live is Christ but to die is gain’.

We’ve been recounting the ‘goodnesses’ that God has been giving through Jace’s death.

God in His Good Plan chose June 14^th for two other significant events beyond our little man’s entering glory, well, two that we know of; you may share others with me! Jace died around 1:45 AM Saturday morning, June 14^th. Later that morning, Johanna Leonard was born and a couple became three. Even later that day, two single lives were joined into a couple before the Lord when Lauren’s good friend, Meredith Elliott, married. June 14 was a good day.

Death is perspective-giving to life: my dad wrote a moving tribute in the form of a poem for little Jace; Family has become even more important to all of us; we take each day as it comes trying to relish the life God grants; a relationship was reconciled at Jace’s celebration; at the reception, Sean found a job by talking to a friend he had not seen in a while; we all have a greater depth of emotion for ministering to others; lives have been redirected as career changes are now being pondered; Heaven is closer and sweeter. Perspective.

Finally, Dear Ones, please accept our humbled and awed thank yous for the tremendous contribution of food to the reception and to our family since Jace’s death. I had to do nothing for this reception due to the kind organizing of close friends and in-laws, who insisted I stay out of this task. I love you guys!

Thank you for the tears shed for us, the prayers covering us, the patience to listen to teary musings about Jace and life and death. Thank you for the monetary contributions to Lauren and Dan that are helping them cope with the mounting medical bills. And, thank you for the lovely floral arrangements and plants that so many provided for Jace’s memorial celebration.

The Point of Grace song, ‘Heal the Wound but Leave the Scar’ has particular meaning to me. We will bear the joyous scar of Jace’s presence these short months, but God is healing the wounded hearts, and in fear and trembling, we know He’ll use us for his glory. Scary, but comforting, too.

Remembrance Celebration for Jace Garrett Steinhaus

Thank you for all the wonderful notes and offers of support. We are overwhelmed and blessed!

Lauren and Dan were able to sleep some last night after almost 48 hours up with only 3 hours of sleep during that time. Many have been praying for them. Thank you.

More details for Tuesday are coming together, which I would like to share.

Remembrance Celebration: Tuesday, June 17, 2008, 3:00 PM, Memorial Oakes Cemetery, 13001 Katy Frwy, Houston, 77079, located on the south side of Katy Freeway between Dairy Ashford and Eldridge. The service will rejoice in Little Jace’s life and reflect our Lord’s triumphant reign in his life and death. We sorrow but not without peace and hope. God is Good.

Flowers may be sent to the funeral home.

Gifts ‘in memory of Jace Garrett Steinhaus’ may be sent to the Ronald McDonald House at Texas Children’s Hospital, Houston, TX. Lauren and Dan spent 5 weeks staying free of charge each night in the Ronald McDonald House just down the hall from Texas Children’s NICU. They were warm, caring, and helpful to Lauren and Dan while they stayed at the House.

Contributions may be sent to:

Ronald McDonald House of Houston

1907 Holcombe Boulevard

Houston, Texas 77030

Private Burial in Memorial Oakes’ Baby Land: Just Lauren and Danny will attend to little Jace’s burial, following the service.

Reception: Following the service, all are invited to Barry and Sharon Hart’s home out in Richmond off of FM 359. The address is 7918 Shamrock, Richmond, 77469. They live off of Winner-Foster in a small subdivision called Karaugh, north of Pecan Grove and Foster High School. Maps and directions will be available at the Remembrance Celebration. Please feel free to join us at the reception even if you can not attend the service at Memorial Oakes. Lauren and Dan will join us after little Jace’s burial. We will release 87 colorful balloons in remembrance of Jace’s tenacious desire to cling to life for 87 days as well as just enjoy some fellowship time.

Below is a note from Nancy Clayton about helping with food for the reception.

A reception will be held at Barry Hart’s parents’ home (Barry and Sharon Hart, 7918 Shamrock Ln., Richmond, 77469) after the memorial service Tuesday. Anyone who would like to contribute food can call me at home (281.265.9453) tonight or reach me by cell phone Monday (713.569.9330 or 713.516.7088) during the day to let me know. I will be taking the food there Tuesday morning.

With thanks on behalf of the Steinhaus and Hart families,
Nancy Clayton

Psalm 16:8-11 (ESV)

“I have set the Lord always before me;

because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken.

Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices; my flesh also dwells secure.

For you will not abandon my soul to Sheol, or let your holy one see corruption.

You make known to me the path of life;

in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.”

This is the word of the Lord, and all His people say, “Amen.”

In His Goodness,

Kathy